for serious?

"Night after night I found myself awake exploring inward and outwardly, sending my gaze back and forth between my physical inner workings and out of a high rise window over a sea of lights, all the while in awe of the collective super-subconscious." - jason mraz (in japan)

i enjoy jraz's blog. good mix of humor, self-congratulatory nonsense and clever insights. once in a while it gets a little too ridiculous - today was one of those days. i actually stopped reading mid-post right after this quote and thought to myself - ok... what? blog this, we must and came directly here. {ok just went back and read the rest - more of the same - awesome!}

namaste to you jason.
e

what the eff?

almost 60 in the shade at noon on my back porch.

a few questions:

do i live in new england?

is it februrary?

are we going to pay for this next week?

YES!

taking my short-sleeved baby outside,
erin

for six years

we have been married.

i picked well. b is the best.

he got me this with Lexis Points

it took this picture of the flowers he got me

and of the baby we made.

i am blissed and blessed.

e

lent

i have been a christian for as long as i can remember. growing up in a mainstream run-of-the-mill somewhat-if-not-completely-and-sometimes-extremely-conservative non-denominationalish evangelical church (more on this to come - hizzah! to full disclosure) i never fully grasped lenten practices. perhaps they were too tied to a letergical way of showing one's faith ((which was out of fashion for the whole of the 90's in run-of-the-mill churches)) or perhaps i went into a daze whenever fasting came up in church (this is the most likely option - as i don't like pain and there was much of the non-religious to divert my attention during sunday school - read: friends and boys). ho.hum.

so, this year i want to take part in lent. i want to be a good steward of the time leading up to easter. i want to take part in the mourning season in preperation for the spring. and i want your help in figuring out what to do. but, before you get all foolhardy and make suggestions like: give up t.v. (yeah, right... i'm in the throws of a very torrid affair with the gilmore girls, don't mess - i'm nursing) or give up alcohol (a prerequisit to my lenten fast is that it not interfere with any social events - example:: you: "erin, why are you turning down the lovely overly salted margarita, you love super salty super taquillay margaritas??" me: {very piously} "oh, i've given up alcohol for lent" you: {internal monologue} "what a pious b****h turning down my super salty super taquillay marg. she thinks she's just so awesome." {out loud} "that's fine. good for you." ... you see what i mean, not a good way to go.). i want to give something up that would occur daily, but not otherwise motivated by weight-loss goals and would inevitably posture me towards easter. i'd actually love for the practice to be non-food related. all this to say, please share with me some of your ideas or past positive experiences of lent.

un-piously yours,
erin

oh, and since today was ash wednesday i was remembering a day in college when my besties and i decided to get smudged (not the offical term). this is what i recall: 1. our dress: two of the three of us wore overalls. {p.s. i heard they're coming back. hmm.} 2. the delicious adrenaline rush of the unfamiliar service - when do i get up? when do i sit down? how do i take communion? do i need to cross myself with holy water? ... delicious confusion 3. but, mostly i recall being in awe of how barren the church walls were in comparison to the last time i had visited, there was a sense of acknowledged emptiness and a longing to be filled - i guess that's what i want while i wait for ressurection sunday.

confessions of a maternityjeanaholic

hello.

I'd like to believe that AtI is a safe place (p.s. i just decided, right this instant, to give my blog a shortened title - makes me feel fancy). A place where honesty is held as the highest virtue. Where people can feel at home to be themselves - no gimics, no trite answers, no spin... well maybe a little bit of spin - i love spin. so, i need to come clean; the truth needs to be told. Here it is :: 3 months out & i am still wearing maternity jeans (there will be NO picture of this phenomenon, sorry). Reasons are two-fold: 1. up until recently no other jeans fit, 2. in case you hadn't heard i got wicked stretch-marks (not happy) and what i call "hard jeans" hurt like hot iron pokers into tender flesh. So, what is the cure? I've asked around to no avail. However, today I may have found an answer - DISCOUNT SHOES!!!! two-thirds off and one-hundred percent awesome::

$13

$15

$11

bought these last month from j.crew's online final sale. it has taken me 2.5 winters to get snow boots. lame, i know. but, i got a great deal on them
$35

also, since i was photographing my purchases i thought i'd put in a plug for my favorite store: LUSH. I got this shampoo today, I'm hoping against hope that it puts a little more platinum in my blond.

fyi: $8.50

so, after a little smidge of retail-therapy i'm feeling okay with wearing pantalones de maternidad for the foreseeable future. Another confession - they are the most comfortable pants I've ever worn (except they are starting to sag ... ugh) and when I first put them on 9 months ago I said outloud "I'm not sure I'll ever wear anything else ever again!"

here's to eating my words,
erin

blog addendum #1:

newsflash - one of east coast besties Melissa K got engaged this weekend. Em and I got the pleasure of her company today. I got some good coversation & a latte, Em got a snuggle & nap in Miss-Lissa's arms. Here is a pic of the lady showing off her amazing engagement ring (props to fiance Odoi for picking it out). I kind of want one. Sleep with one eye open Melissa!

blog addendum #2:

Em is back in the bowl - not so happy about it. Mommy is mean. :)

blog addendum #3:

the little girl loves her momma. so much that she now cries when i leave the room, don't look her in the eye while she's awake (like to talk to another person or read an email or blink), and if i talk while nursing ... blood curdling screams. em demands that if you are in her presence you must act as if no one else exists - i try to take it as a sign of love. funny side note: if i am the one to put her asleep she can be cranky-cranky tired with red eyes and big yawns, but if she can make contact with my open eyes she will fight to stay awake. though, the minute i close my eyes but keep "looking" at her she will follow suit and go to sleep. silly baby.

i kind of crazy about her too.